Oh the joy! The eager anticipation! What new snippet of theological exhortation will the letters page offer us, once again?
Without the spiritual guidance and corrective exhortations delivered unto us through the letters section of the SY Gazette, where would we be?
We owe an immeasurable debt of gratitude to those holy pontificators, those god-guided, ultra-holy, modern-day saints, without whose guidance, their invaluable lessons on all matters corporeal and spiritual, our daily, sin-laden lives would be so dull and dreary?
How you bring us cheer, Mr Morrison? How we depend on your reassurance on the Sabbath, Mr Mansfield? How could we gain a proper understanding of our dire political condition without your wisdom, Mr Fernie? Mr Murray, oh please, how could we live our lives without your carefully constructed arguments? Please, all of you, continue to entertain us, continue to add strength and vigour to your sermons. Please go read Leviticus all over again and please please tell us what we must do in order to properly honour our duty unto your loving god’s demand that we stone, kill, maim, destroy and totally eradicate all manner of sin from the Western Islands’ environs.
But, please, would you mind terribly if we, your dutiful readers, also pray for the removal of the planks from thine own beautiful and ever-loving eyes?
Now, having got that of my chest, I’ll go relax and enjoy the Address to the Unco Guid, written by Robert Burns; written with people such as you lot on his mind!
May the love of Jesus Christ become revealed unto you, as you learn to love your neighbours.